Which of the following is NOT mentioned as the cause of the generation gap?

M: Parents often complain that children do not show them proper respect and obedience, while children complain that their parents do not understand them at all. Actually, the generation gap has been around for a long time. What had gone wrong? What should we do? Today Sarah Lyman is on our show. Let’s see what insights she offers into this problem. Welcome, Sarah. So tell us what possibly caused the generation gap?
F: (1) Well, one important cause of the generation gap is the opportunity that young people have to choose their own life styles. In more traditional societies, when children grow up, they are expected to live in the same area as their parents, to marry people that their parents know and approve of, and often to continue the family occupation. In modern society, young people often travel great distances for their educations, move out at an early age, marry or live with people whom their parents have never met, and choose occupations different from those of their parents.
M: Right.
F: (1) Furthermore, in our upwardly mobile society, parents often expect their children to be better than they did: to find better jobs, to make more money, and to do all the things that they were unable to do. Often, however, the ambitions that parents have for their children are another cause of the division between them. Often they discover that they have very little in common with each other. (1) Finally, the speed at which changes take place in our society is another cause of the gap between the generations. In a traditional culture, elderly people are valued for their wisdom, but in our society the knowledge of a lifetime may become out of date overnight. The young and the old seem to live in two very different worlds, separated by different skills and abilities.
M: How do teenagers usually act, Sarah?
F: (2) Many teenagers act against their parents’ wishes. If we value neatness, our teenagers will be sloppy. They’ll leave their rooms disordered and their clothes dirty. If we insist on good manners, they will act poorly. For example, they’ll interrupt conversations. If we enjoy language that is beautiful, they will speak slang. If we treasure peace, they will quarrel with others. If we are concerned about health, they will wear summer clothes in freezing weather.
M: Then how about their parents? What do they usually do?
F: Parents usually respond in the following way. First, we get hard. When this fails, we turn to kindness. When no results follow, we try reasoning. When gentle reasoning falls on deaf ears, we return to threats and punishments.
M: What can parents do to stay reasonable? What do you suggest them to do in the face of the unavoidable?
F: (3) Wise parents have a better idea of what they should do. They know that fighting a teenager, like fighting a tide, is inviting failure. When caught in a cross-current, experienced swimmers stop struggling. They float and let the tide carry them, until they find a firm footing. Parents should act in the same way. They should flow with life, paying attention to what is happening with their children. By remaining aware, but not opposing a child’s actions, a parent makes himself available as a guide. And when trouble comes, as it always does with teenagers, the understanding parent will advise the right thing to do. This will cut down on many problems. And everyone will be happier.
M: I am learning a lot.
F: (4) It is natural for young people to be critical of their parents at times and to blame them for most of the misunderstandings between them. They have always complained, more or less justly, that their parents are out of touch with modern ways; that they are possessive and dominant that they do not trust their children to deal with crises; that they talk too much about certain problems — and that they have no sense of humor, at least in parent-child relationships.
M: What are the reasons behind?
F: I think it is true that parents often underestimate their teenage children and also forget how they themselves felt when young. Young people often irritate their parents with their choices in clothes and hairstyles, in entertainers and music. (5) This is not their motive. They feel cut off from the adult world into which they have not yet been accepted. So they create a culture and society of their own. Then, if it turns out that their music or entertainers or vocabulary or clothes or hairstyles irritate their parents, this gives them additional enjoyment. They feel they are superior, at least in a small way, and that they are leaders in style and taste.
M: So you mean, sometimes they are resistant and proud because they do not want their parents to approve of what they do?
F: Exactly. If they do approve, it looks as if they are betraying their own age group. But in that case, they are assuming that they are the underdog: they can’t win but at least they can keep their honor. This is a passive way of looking at things. It is natural enough after long years of childhood, when they were completely under their parents’ control. But it ignores the fact that they are now beginning to be responsible for themselves. If they plan to control their life, cooperation can be part of that plan. They can charm others, especially parents, into doing things the way they want. They can impress others with their sense of responsibility and initiative.
M: Ok, thanks for sharing with us your viewpoint on generation gap and family relations. Nice talking with you, Sarah.
F: Nice talking with you too.