All couples have problems and disagreements,so it’s critical that they learn how tocommunicate about them in a way that will be

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问题 All couples have problems and disagreements,so it’s critical that they learn how tocommunicate about them in a way that will be helpful instead of making them worse.I do notbelieve that prescribing specific techniques for communicating is as helpful as focusing on the coreattitudes behind the communication.My thoughts on effectively communicating about ANY difficultissue are in keeping with the ideas I used in the“assertiveness training”I did back in the 70s.
What I learned was that I could tell people the“correct”words to use and“correct”body language.et@C@to be“assertive”--but none of it worked unless it eame from“inside”the person.
In other words,your ability to communicate has more to do with your attitudes and beliefsabout your“right to know”and the degree of“equality”in the relationship,or lack there of and thedegree of“caring”involved between the two people than in whatever actual words or techniquesyou use.All these things are FAR more important than the“skills”.You can“t just”put on theskills like a coat  and have them work.As I said,the words need to come as an outgrowth Of anattitude of genuinely wanting to effectively work on whatever problem is being discusse@D@
Another similarity between learning how to effectively discuss a problem and how people learnto talk in an assertive manner is that even if you say everything“just right”(in accordance with theguidelines for using good communication skills),there is no guarantee that the other person willreceive it in the way it is intende@D@For instance,with assertiveness,someone could perfectlyexecute an“assertive”conversation and still have it be interpreted as being“aggressive”.
One way of determining the specific words that are more likely to be effective is to think interms of the“ego states”as defined by transactional analysis:“parent,adult,and child”.You’llhave more likelihood of success by approaching the discussion from an“adult”.problem-solvingway of talking.while avoiding using the“judgmental”words of a“parent”or the“hurt feelings”words of a“child”.The bottom line is that you don’t need specific communication skills so muchas you need to approach any conversation with a certain attitude:that the clear goal is to“improvethe relationship“rather than to just”criticize“and/or”change”the other person.With that spirit,you have a better chance of success;without it,all the communication skills in the world won’t beenough.
What is considered by the author as much more important than specific techniques ineffective communication?______

选项 A、One’s fight to know.
B、One’s attitudes and beliefs behind the communication.
C、The degree of“equality”in the relationship.
D、The degree of“caring”involved between the two people.

答案B

解析 细节判断题。问题是“作者认为在有效沟通中什么比特别技巧更加重要”。原文第一段第二句说“我不认为开列出一些沟通的特别技巧会和关注沟通背后的核心态度一样有益”;第二段第一句说“换句话说,你的沟通能力更多地取决于你对你的知情权、两人关系的平等(或不平等)程度以及相互关爱的程度的态度和信念,而不是你具体使用了什么字眼或技巧。”选项B的意思是“隐藏在沟通背后的态度和信念更为重要”,很显然与原文意思一致。选项A的意思是“知情权更为重要”,选项C的意思是“彼此关系的平等程度”.选项D的意思是“相互关爱的程度”,根据原文第二段第一句,这三者都只是态度和信念的一个方面或具体体现,是以偏概全的干扰项。
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