首页
外语
计算机
考研
公务员
职业资格
财经
工程
司法
医学
专升本
自考
实用职业技能
登录
外语
Benjie Goodhart is in his late 30s, adores his partner and has a young son. But the thought of marriage has paralyzed him with f
Benjie Goodhart is in his late 30s, adores his partner and has a young son. But the thought of marriage has paralyzed him with f
admin
2011-04-11
33
问题
Benjie Goodhart is in his late 30s, adores his partner and has a young son. But the thought of marriage has paralyzed him with fear. And it’s all thanks to his parents’ perfect marriage. Benjie Goodheart felt the pressure of wanting an idealized version of his parents’ relationship.
According to Christine Northam, a relationship counselor with Relate. "It’s like having a terribly clever elder brother at school—it sets a competitive standard," she says. "It’s a normal anxiety about a big change, and you’ve got the added pressure of wanting an idealized version of your parents’ relationship. " It seems such anxiety is not uncommon. "As much as it’s hard to cope with parents being imperfect, cheating, splitting," says therapist Tracey Cox, "it is sometimes harder to be presented with the ideal happy marriage. " Avy Joseph is a cognitive behavioral therapist and founder of CityMinds. "It’s quite common for people to put pressure on themselves," he says, "if they’ve grown up in an environment where, in their view, things have been perfect. "
Overcoming these fears involves accepting your marriage may not be perfect, but if it isn’t you will cope. Just because something isn’t perfect doesn’t mean it’s worthless. And if your marriage ends in divorce, it doesn’t define you as a failure. "Your own worth isn’t dependent on the success of your marriage," says Joseph. Working at Relate, Christine Northam knows no marriage is perfect. "I don’t know anybody who is 100% happy with their marriage. Most marriages go through ups and downs. You’re idealizing it. You have a false impression of what real marriage is like. Most married people hate each other at times, frankly. You can’t be perfectly in love all the time. " So marriage is not the happy ending of the fairy-tales. I love the fact that, 44 years after they married, my parents still hold hands, make each other giggle, and tease each other. But they would doubtless balk at the idea that their marriage is perfect. Mum suffers from terrible vertigo, yet Dad persists in taking enormous detours every holiday through a mountain range. Dad could spend a week looking at a ruined church, whereas Mum could do the Acropolis in five minutes flat. Hundreds more took place along the recurring themes of what time to leave for the airport (Mum, six hours before a flight; Dad, six minutes) , how to pour a drink (Mum, fill a large glass to the brim; Dad, quarter-fill a thimble) and how best to pass leisure time (Mum, bulk-buying from catalogue companies; Dad, reading every column inch of the newspaper).
They aren’t perfect. They just love each other enough to deal with the imperfections. As Cox says: "What they are good at is having faith, loving each other and finding compromises to make them both happy. No one breezes through (marriage) without working at it. " And yes, I would hope to have a marriage as successful as theirs. But I know it will take some work. I’m ready for that. I finally got down on one knee this year. After waiting for the perfect romantic moment, I realized it would probably never come. I had prevaricated long enough. So I asked her on the spur of the moment, while I was unpacking the shopping from the car, with Wendy in a bath towel standing in our driveway asking why I’d put Fred in the boot of the car (he’d insisted) while he banged on the rear windscreen, pronouncing loudly about his latest fecal production. The proposal wasn’t on a moonlit beach or over a candlelit dinner, but slap bang in the minutiae of everyday life, in all its hilarious, glorious ridiculousness—and because of the person she is, Wendy loved it. And so it is that I find myself marching towards my impending nuptials, eyes wide open, resolve secure, safe in the knowledge that I am punching well above my weight with the woman who will be my wife. Benjie and Wendy were married last Saturday.
What does "balk" mean in the third paragraph?
选项
A、accept
B、refuse to comply
C、suspect
D、challenge
答案
B
解析
文章第三段中“balk”的意思是什么?该题考查考生的词汇量和对上下文的理解。根据上下文,作者认为没有一段婚姻是完美的,同时举出父母作为实例,所以对于婚姻完美这一观点,父母肯定是不认同的。
转载请注明原文地址:https://jikaoti.com/ti/4EpYFFFM
0
专业英语八级
相关试题推荐
不消说,相识的人数是随了年龄增加的,一个人年龄越大,走过的地方当过的职务越多,相识的人理该越增加了。可是相识的人并不就是朋友。我们和许多人相识,或是因了事务关系,或是因了偶然的机缘——如在别人请客的时候同席吃过饭之类。见面时点头或握手,有事时走访或通信,口
TheDepartmentofHomelandSecurityhasfilledthenation’stopcyber-securitypostafterthepreviouschiefabruptlyresignedl
ThelargestandsmalleststatesoftheUnitedStatesare______.
______looksatlanguagefromapsychologicalpointofview,andtohim,competenceisapropertyofthemindofeachindividual
TwoofthemostimportantmeninAmericafacedeachotheratdawnonJuly1,1804.Therewerenowordsofgreetingnoranysmile
Northernmarshesarebeingturnedintoempty,desecratedmudflatwasteland.Theculprit?Snowgeese.Thesemarshesaretheb
A、loweducationalstandardsB、lackoftrainingC、capitalintensivemodemindustryD、laborintensivemodemindustryD
Thethoughtofhavingtowritearesumeintimidatesalmostevery,graduatingstudent.It’sdifficulttoknowwheretobeginand
TheidealseasonforplantingthecropinthemainfieldisJuly-AugustorNovember-December.Plantingisdoneonraisedbedsof
TheidealseasonforplantingthecropinthemainfieldisJuly-AugustorNovember-December.Plantingisdoneonraisedbedsof
随机试题
a.thepriceorcostoftransportationb.thebankthataddsitsowncommitmenttoanL/Cc.apaymentdemandedinaccordancewi
什么是安慰剂?双盲试验的意义是什么?
临床生化实验采取标本应用最多的是
患儿,女,2岁。高热,面红气粗,频繁呕吐,神昏谵语,惊厥3次,舌红绛苔黄干,脉弦有力。检查:颈抵抗(+),腰穿示脑脊液压力增高,外观混浊,白细胞200×109/L,中性粒细胞为主。应首先考虑的是()
有限责任公司董事会会议每年召开的频率是()。
纳税人提供的下列劳务中,按照开发或完成的进度确认收入实现的有()。
动机强度越高,越有利于取得成功。
在他读中学时就很重视外语学习。
增长年金[中山大学2013金融硕士]
Smokingisnotpermittedintheoffice.
最新回复
(
0
)